Of Wings and Roots

A friend just got reunited with his ex-girlfriend, and true to the form of first-meeting-after-break-up, I imagined he was thrown into confusion that left him reeling from the encounter afterwards.



Theirs is a common enough love story. Boy meets girl, boy pursues girl, girl falls in love and they lived happily ever after. In their case, ever after lasted for only a few years. Sounds familiar, right? I’d imagined it would be. There are so many stories, similar in themes, different characters, different settings, but the same ending. And the sad thing is, there is an ending.



What happens after the ending is where the stories finally take different twists for different people. In their story, my friend wanted to settle down, plant roots and prepare for a future with a wife that he loves and a family that adores him. Those are his roots, his wife and children. He believes he has everything to offer a future wife – travels to exotic cities and a bright future for their children, if any.



But then, the girl is waiting to get her wings. The girl is pursuing another path, different from his, and she’s eager and excited to get her wings so she can fly. She’s looking forward to a different kind of adventure. How far her wings can take her. How high she can fly. That is her future, already different from his. She might like to rest and be with someone who has roots for sometime, but if she has wings, it will be like tying a bird to a cage. She’ll get bored and restless and no matter how big and grand and expensive her cage is, she’ll still see it like it is, a cage. She is looking out at a different horizon than my friend who is seeing a different future for the both of them.



Truly, love is not gazing into each other’s eyes, but looking together in the same direction. The two of them are probably still madly in love with each other, but alas, they are threading separate paths to the their own life's destinations. One road is not better than the other, just different.



And that is the sad ending of this chapter in their story. Only they can tell when, if and how their story will really end.



But the thing is, my friend told me that both of them are sad and weary of love because theirs was perfect and yet they have fallen out of love. I told him that it was never perfect in the first place, and it’s surely not perfect now. It’s just that now the truth is so obvious in its clarity - it seems that they are not perfect for each other after all.



I don’t know how I can explain this more than I already did, but in a nutshell, if you found someone who’s perfect for you, then, true love is effortless, and it will never end. My friend is still quite baffled why two people seemingly perfect for each other should go through this much heartbreak.



In my opinion, how can a bird, which is looking forward to flying and exploring the horizon, be perfect with a person who would like to have lots of roots? I don't know what will happen for them in the future, who knows? But for now, they have reached a crossroad, and I think they have already chosen their separate paths.