I didn’t know it then. It was almost Christmas when my Mom brought me to the pet store to pick a puppy for my sister Lorraine. She told me to choose one of the two Maltese playing in the cage. I picked the one who looked at me mischievously. I didn’t know it then. It was love at first sight.
He was my sister’s dog. But he was mine in every aspect except ownership. Mine to love, and he loves me. I spoiled him rotten. He looks at me with that patented lost puppy look and I will always cave in. Whatever he wants. If he wants to sleep on my bed, I let him. If he wants to eat a dozen chocolates, I give him Kisses. We brought him whenever there’s a family outing if my mom grumbled at me the whole time for bringing the dog, I just couldn’t leave him alone at home.
Truth be told, he was a lot of my firsts. I slept with on my bed. I kissed. French. First love. And I couldn’t choose a better candidate for my first love. I guess he ruined every guy after because none of them can love better than him.
He loved me unconditionally. Not expecting much, just little pats of affection, a hug every now and then, a kiss once in a while. And still, loyal to a fault. Waiting for me to come home every day. Knows my footsteps, my voice, and my touch. I guess we humans don’t love like that. Giving our whole life to one person, without conditions, without expecting much.
It got ugly during his last years. I am ashamed to admit that I didn’t hug him that much, just glanced at him every now and then. Because I can’t stand to look at him die right before our eyes. I hope he’ll understand, wherever he is. I didn’t love him less, just because he got old. I just … couldn’t accept it. Probably distancing myself. I don’t know. I’m just probably making excuses. But I didn’t love him less. That much I know.
So I know now it’s true. True love? It really lasts a lifetime. I love Chewy, and I will probably not love another dog as much as I love him.
*Chewy passed away this morning, December 4, 2005, at the age of 16 human years. I prayed, and prayed that dogs really do go to heaven. I'll stop crying now.
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