Floating

It is a lot less than swimming, for you're not moving at all. Just lying with your back on the water, with your arms spread out and your eyes closed, just letting the water take you wherever it wants to. Or, you're on your stomach and you're trying to hold your breath as long as you can, not moving an inch, for there is no one to disturb the water, and so it doesn't even really bring you anywhere. When you're already out of breath, you stand up and you find yourself in the same place as where you started. Doing it on water requires a lot of current for you to move. Someone has to make a splash somewhere; otherwise, you stay where you are.



To go with the flow, it will take others for you to move. But you will move alongside the rest of them. Wherever they want you to go, there you will be.



I feel like I've just been floating for years. I've been following the crowd, letting them make big splashes in their lives and I try to hold my breath as long as possible, seemingly waiting for the inevitable force, hopefully that wonderful thing, that will move my life to any direction.



Then, when I cannot hold my breath any longer, I stand up, and realized I was in nearly drowning in deep waters, and I can barely thread to save my life. Everyone is moving, swimming leisurely; swimming fast, some lagging behind, and many, like me, floating and letting a few people lead them to their destiny.



Funny, this is not where I want to be. But this is where those years of floating took me.



I started swimming, slowly but surely, hoping to finally gain distance towards the right direction. It will take a lot of prayer and hard work, but I'll get there someday.